Breaking up is one of the terrible phases of any relation. Breaking up with someone is a very depressing experience for us. But very often we got our best friends as cheering squad ..as that shoulder to cry on and the ear to hear those curses as we go through the hell of moving on. They are the ones who have been there for us from ups to downs but what happens when it is them we lose?
To many women, friendship breakups are harder than romantic breakups. With romantic breakups, we get sad but we recover because we usually know the reasons why. But with friendship breakups, “women feel a lot of shame, guilt, sadness, and confusion” because we expect friendship to last forever since we have known them all our lives. They are part of us that shaped us to who we were. They are our siblings from another parent and emotional support. But in a snap, they have cut out of our lives.
We were friends with them for a simple reason that we clicked… so when a friend leaves us, does it mean he/she doesn’t like us or vice versa as a person anymore and we just let the relationship slip without closure that we seek after romantic relationships? It’s harder to address friendship breakups which are awkward yet devastating because it’s not something people talk about. We make friends so effortlessly like you two just get along and it goes on without thinking it will end which makes the breakup harder to deal because nobody prepares us for losing a friend. Add in the fact that the person knows you inside and out, it’s an addition to the recipe for feeling betrayed and thinking how bad of a person we had been.
WHAT GOES WRONG ?
One of the reasons why friendship breakups happen because we have different paths to take and as we get older and know more of what we really want in life that’s different from our best friend. We end up outgrowing one without noticing it until the communication doesn’t seem to exist anymore and without knowing, we lose the biggest pieces of our heart.
Some people stay. Some people go. One thing they have in common is we meet them for a reason, perhaps to teach us a lesson. Most of us have learned not to hold on to people anymore. We have to understand that it’s inevitable for people to grow apart. That has to be okay because, despite the walls that were built between those people and us, it doesn’t mean we care less for them. It’s just that everything is not the same anymore between us and it’s okay, it will be okay, it’s going to be okay.